You're riding the subway, and a guy sitting near you starts picking his nose. And when I say picking, I mean that his finger is so far up his nose, it's almost touching his brain. He then stands up and uses that same hand to hold onto a subway pole. You:
1. Projectile vomit, press the emergency button so that the train stops, run out screaming, and vow to never ride public transit again. Buy the first car that you see, even if it's a Ford.
2. Gag. Start thinking of the benefits of a world-wide eugenics program, which presumably weed out people like that from the gene pool.
3. Slap his hand away, and say in a loud and clear voice "No! Don't do that! That's wrong."
4. Shrug. Years of taking the TTC has jaded you to the extent that you're pretty much apathetic to every weird thing you see.
I'm sure it won't surprise anyone that my answer is 4. Besides, it could have been worse: he could have also been reading a porn magazine, clipping his toe-nails, playing on his electronic keyboard at top volume, putting on deodorant, engaging in a heavy-petting session, taking off his shirt to do chin-ups on the top handle-bar, and more. I've seen all those things on public transit (and done a couple myself).
Edited to add: I've also seen people urinate on the subway platform. How could I forget that? But there's also something awesome about the TTC. When I was coming home on Saturday night, it was a girl's birthday, and her friends had everyone on my train sing "Happy Birthday" to her.
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2 comments:
Don't ever take the Greyhound. These creeps take their hands from up their noses and unzip their pants and XXXXXXXXXXX
Oh, I've seen that. But it could have been worse: I could have been decapitated on the Greyhound.
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