Perchance to dream

I don't have dreams. And I'm not talking about hopes and goals and aspirations. I have those -- they're just irreparably shattered after falling off the Cliffs of Reality. No, I mean that when I'm sleeping, I rarely dream. Or according to my sister Ilana, I do, and I just don't remember them when I wake up in the morning.

I wish I did, because they could be cool. Some people believe they're flashes into past lives. Others think that they yield valuable insights into the subconscious. So, my little Freudians, help me analyze this dream that I had last night.

I was in Shoppers Drug Mart to buy milk because I ran out a few days ago (that's true). But instead of $2.99 a bag, its regular price, it was $4.95. And I wasn't sure if I should buy it there or go to Sobeys because it would probably be cheaper.

Fascinating, right? Almost gives you goosebumps. It truly reflects deep eternal truths. Namely, that I ran out of milk a few days ago. I haven't had the chance to buy any more yet, so I've been deprived of my daily cup of coffee.

Which is why this scared the hell out of me this morning:

My roommate went to the Ex yesterday and won a giant stuffed lion. She put it near the washroom. Each time I walk by, I jump. It's almost as bad as the bearskin rug my parents used to own. It must have had the same effect on my sister, because we're both vegetarian.