He baldly went where no man had gone before!

So in case you didn't know, I was a little excited about going to see Patrick Stewart (I know and love him as Captain Picard from Star Trek) in a West End play called A Life in the Theatre. It also featured Joshua Jackson, Pacey from Dawson's Creek. But you can guess who I was more excited about seeing! By some wonderful act of G-d, I got a front row centre seat for the price of the cheapest seat in the house. And all throughout the week, I was getting more and more excited.

Then, it came time for my continuing mission: to get ready and to seek out the theatre! I got dressed up as nicely as I possibly could. With only 3 shirts and 2 pairs of pants, it's hard to 'set my phaser on stun'ing. But I made do. And I set out to watch the play. Now, to speed things up a little because this internet is expensive, pretend that you went through a wormhole that sends you forward through time. I saw the play! And it frigging rocked!! Now I've always thought that Stewart was a great actor. That's why he has my unending love. And this play just reinforced it, again and again. Jackson wasn't so hot in the beginning (it took him a while to relax and warm up, which he eventually did) and Stewart basically carried the show for the first few scenes.

The play itself was very well written and enjoyable. Now I'd like to read more of Mamet's stuff. The beginning especially was hilarious, but it soon became sad and serious. The language, to my delight, was so crude. Stewart used the C-word that Sophie is so fond of a couple times. I see the appeal. It's refreshing to hear and say it! I don't think I've laughed so much in a theatre for a long, long time. And throughout the whole thing, I kept on thinking: 'Why, he's standing a metre away from me. I can just lean forward and touch him! Or grab his legs and pull him off the stage!' But luckily, I refrained from doing so. He kept on making eye contact with me, which isn't surprising, because I was right in front of him. And it might have also been because I was staring at him the whole time, even when it was Jackson's line. Hey, can you blame me?

I made friends with these students from Mississippi, half of whom were Jackson fans, the other half (the smart ones) were fans of Stewart. So together we went after the show to the stage door to try to get an autograph. Unfortunately, a lot of other people had that same idea, and it was packed! Easily one hundred people starting off. I debated for a long time whether or not I should go because I'm not really the celebrity meeter type. I like them on screen, but often, when I've actually met them (working at security at concerts) I've been dissapointed and it ruins them for me. I can't enjoy a Russell Crow movie anymore because he was a prick when I met him. However, I decided to make an exception in this case. It's Captain Picard! He must be cool!

Well, to a certain extent, I'm glad I waited because after 20 minutes, both he and Jackson came out. They said thank you all so much, but please don't wait around for us, because we're going to continue to rehearse and won't be leaving for a long, long time. Bull. So I, along with my new Mississippi friends, and almost everyone else, stayed around. Slowly people started to drift away, probably because it was cold and they gave up faith. But we die-hards stayed. After another 30 minutes, a lady came out (a producer, I think) and said that if we still wanted to wait, they'd be out in an hour. So of course we continued waiting! It actually was fun. Although I thought that I was a sad, pathetic person to be stalking an actor, it was cool being in the crowd, laughing, joking, and so on. One of the security guards in particular was awesome. He told us jokes (which were awful), showed us pictures of his wife and his new 'Star Trek' watch which is very technologically cool, therefore the name, and so on. At one point, he took out a notebook, wrote something on it, then held it up and said that it was Stewart's autograph, and he'd be willing to sell it for £50! Great guy. He lived for a while in Canada, so of course he was cool.

Although we were having a good time, we eventually got restless. Then the bad news came. Our guard found out that apparently both Stewart and Jackson had snuck out through another exit. We were not pleased. Sure, it would be a bitch to sign all the autographs, and I'm sure that they were tired after the performance. And yes, they had come out briefly, but the producer lady told us that they would be coming out again! So we waited, in the cold, for nearly 2 hours. I was not impressed. I was especially pissed off when it happened, but now I'm more understanding. I wasn't entirely comfortable with the idea of meeting him and getting his autograph, which I find demeaning, and so it's just as well that it didn't work out. And even though it didn't have a happy ending, the evening in general was fantastic. Good play, fantastic acting. And did I mention that both Stewart and Jackson stripped to their underwear? Good times.